Once you’ve met a girl (or two!), the next step is usually doing all the follow up work and getting her out on a date. And that’s one of the things that I used to always do TERRIBLE at. I’d get into these long phone or text conversations with girls, that would take up hours of time and end up going NOWHERE.
Felt like I was beating my head against a wall. And the wall was winning.
Flash forward to these days, and I’m killing it. I trained myself up — now I know how to have good phone conversations, but even more importantly, now I know how to text a girl. Because knowing how to do that well makes life SO much easier.
My texts used to look like this:
Me: What’s kickin’?
Her: Not much. Just studying… blah. What about you?
Me: Yeah, studying for me too. Just had a really gigantic sandwich.
Her: That’s cool..
And then they might limp on a little more from there, but you get the drift. My texting didn’t go anywhere at all.
Lately my texts look like THIS:
Me: Carol, what’s going on? Hope your weekend was awesome. I’m just getting ready for the week ahead… any big plans coming up?
Her: Hey E, weekend was okay. Played mini-golf on Sunday for the first time since I was like 5. How was yours? No big plans this week so far.
Me: Mine was good, though not as exciting as yours… no windmills or sand traps :/ What’s your schedule like this week? We should get some food and chill.
Her: Okay! Let me see what my schedule’s like and I’ll text you tonight.
Boom! Easy dates. What’s funny is, it felt like a long learning curve, but it really only ended up being a few minor changes I made to my texting with girls that made all the difference. Check out these ground rules I follow now with all of my text message flirting:
- Always use girls’ names. I can’t believe I didn’t realize this before, but girls are SO much warmer and nicer to you when you use their names, and they actually seem excited to hear from you. Jeez, it should’ve been a no-brainer. Well, now I know: use girls names, at least for the first text in a new texting conversation.
- Keep it light and positive. Sometimes (okay, a lot) I used to talk about how boring my life was or how nothing was going on with girls. Now, in reflection… yeah, THAT’S a great way to make a girl want to hang out with you! Now I realize you should always be a breath of fresh air; girls should be THRILLED to get your text, not like, “Oh no, it’s Downer Boy again.” Be the uplifting guy instead of the annoying, depressing guy!
- Don’t have any deep discussions via text. I don’t just mean like if Buddhism is better than Hinduism or whether pink shirts mean you’re gay or not. I’m talking about stuff like the two of you talking about relationships or deep thoughts or life problems or anything. Never talk about that stuff over text! I used to do it a lot, so take my word for it — all it does is make a girl respond to you less and less after the “deep texting event.” Girls just don’t want to talk to you after you went all deep with your thumbs.
- Always go for the date fast. I used to think I was really sneaky by drawing girls into these long texting conversations, like they wouldn’t realize that what I REALLY wanted was to go out with them, and instead I’d fool them into seeing how great I was FIRST, and then they’d be salivating to go out with me. My buddy Hec caught me doing this a few times and threatened to throw my phone in the trash because he said I was wasting my life on uselessness. Duh. Now I just cut the crap and ask girls out right away. And, lo and behold, it works a hell of a lot better. Whoda thunk?
I combine my awesome texting abilities (these days) with being a sexy man and working on my skill in picking up women, and voila, success with girls becomes this upward-bound curve that always seems to be going higher.
Now instead of painful, interminable, ineffective text messages, I can text a girl great stuff, with a minimum of messages, and get her out on a date, and she’s happier to see me than those few kind-hearted souls I managed to wrangle out on dates after bombarding them with 100+ message text conversations. If you’re still doing that –immediately start doing the above steps instead. You’ll be back on here thanking me in a few days!
E